A Private Play Date After a While ...

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Giving Thanks

I like the part of Thanksgiving where people give thanks for what they find of value in their lives especially with regards to other. For me it really doesn't matter if there are people around or not. It is the seeking of the positive over the past year, who you have become to be and for the positive parts of the road travel for yourself.

I say this in the context that  I don't view the commercial start of Thanksgiving with positive thoughts. For me it is the start of some combination of drama, stress and social pressures the week before Thanksgiving until sometime after the New Years.

For example, I thought I had a dorm room to live in until summer but found out the college I attended closed them for two or more weeks making me homeless again. I have on numerous occasions ended up working in one way or another during the holidays, at first for the money but later on to handle my job. There were a few years where because of business, there was no money, no food and I lost 10 or more pounds to only have a welcome amount of money appear at the end of January. Even when I made sure, there was money and I wasn't suppose to work, it was amazing how things still ended up a mess.

Therefore I could totally relate when this morning my son, gave me a hug and said "thanks" to me. He explained that if he had been at my ex's place, this day would be yet another day of stress. It made me smile and I didn't mention the several dramas that unfolded at work on Tuesday that could have made my Thanksgiving a stress ball.

So I begin ...

Thanks for the good people in my life!

There was a point in my life, I would guess about age 19 where another wave of insanity had hit me. My life, my body and the world was out of control. The predators in the world seemed to sense this and pursued me for their sexual needs, wanted to "convert" me, wanted me for news and other motivations. There were others who just enjoyed making life horrible for others and found me on their radar. I really thought less of people in general.

Yet again, in this haze of insanity, some small kindness happened and happened again and again. I expected strings to be attached. I expected some sort of betrayal. The thing is nothing happen like that. It was just goodness from people I didn't understand but were part of my life.

I started to believe slowly in adding to the community and making the world a better place. The trick was to be with those good people.

My world at that time was a sub-culture that was misunderstood but I built on it. I steered toward the good people and it worked out well.

When I entered the kinky world, it seemed to be the same way. I continued to steer toward the good people.

I am so blessed by the kinky good friends. Thank you.

Thanks to my kids!

I am so glad they are in my life even though there is an ebb and a flow. I have worried, carried, hugged, prayed, cried, freaked out, stressed out, waited by the phone and so on for so much of their lives that it is fantastic that they both seem to have their heads on straight and are making tough choices.

I don't wish the insanity I had early in my life on them. I can't shelter them from that. I can just be there and hopefully make the right choices in how to support them so they come out of it okay. I still worry on occasion but they are old enough that I have to let them be themselves.

Thanks to my Poly Group!

Being alone is easy but I can't do it. It was easy when a play partner become my lover. It didn't really matter she had other lovers and doms in her life. It got more complicated when I added another serious play partner. It definitely got more complicated when another relationship turned into a lover.

They put up with me. I am amazed by that. I appreciate it and don't take it for granted. I can't be something I am not nor will I try to be monogamous.

I love the three women in my life, two of which are "my girls". I am blessed. I am very thankful for them.

Thanks to the Community Drivers: Advocates, Educators, Organizers, etc.

I have gone to numerous events, taken numerous classes, purchased media (books, DVDs, access web media, etc.) and learned about my kinky sexual side many new things, have improved my rope skills and have meet many wonderful people.

This wouldn't be possible with people spear heading things in a positive way, doing things in a positive way and organizing things. There is tons of negative thinking connected to sex and blatant broken assumptions. Things would be a much different world if people were not pushing forward in organizing, educating and so on whether it was kink related, sex related, gender related, sex worker related, slut walk related, feminist related and so on.

When I can, I try to help. It may be as simple as attended the event, going to the class, helping clean up at an event, buying an educators book or making a donation. I do what I can anonymously.

It is their work that makes the world a better place. I can't be out in front but I do what I can to support their efforts.

My thanks to them!

Final Thanks: Good Heath

I myself have had problems with health. My one partner has survived cancer. Another one had some huge health issues. I know others are struggling.

I pray and hope for good health. There have been ups and downs but things are good. I am keeping my fingers crossed and counting my blessings.

My thanks for the good health with my friends and myself!